Hello there “humans” , and I say humans vaguely being the majority of us are not from planet Earth. Sure, A seldom few, the “chosen ones” may be but that’s a tale for another saga. Anyways, Uncle Ant here to inform you on our new section – Conspiracy Theories. Week by week, your kooky Uncle Ant will be diving deep into the realm of history, unfolding the conspiracy’s you simple minded specimens have been overlooking for far too long. No longer shall you live in the shadows uniformed. Uncle Ant is here to f**k you up with some truth, thus releasing the shackles that are burdening your mind. The scrolls of history are about to be re-f***ing written. Follow me on this journey to discover the world’s deepest darkest secrets. Spoiler alert, Ant is not my real alias either. The government may be listening and by may, I assure you, they f***ing are. Stay woke friends. Side note, pretty certain Kurt Warner is actually Papa John; far too many similarities. Stay tuned, my flock.
Not a lamb in the governmental flock? Perfect. Send in your own stories to Officejockeys@gmail.com. Put Conspiracy Theories as the subject line, and specify if you wish to be published or stay anonymous.