There is no worse feeling than that violent phone alarm finger blasting it’s way deep into the crevices that is your ear hole. Each and every Monday begins the same way. The weekend Booze Hound you’ve digressed to in your early corporate life dreads this moment every Sunday night. Fear and complete horror occupy your body as the brutal reality sets in as your Sunday brunch bonanza has come to a halt. While you sit in pure misery inhabited in a house destroyed by empty pizza boxes, beer cans and regret; something begins to happen. Palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy; 8 miles on!? No, that’s your panic attack vigorously gearing up as your brain just registered you have a full 40-hour ass-kicking ahead. Sure, this was the norm in college, nay the Sunday ritual if you will. However, some company ill advisedly employed you, meaning you have responsibilities tomorrow. Unlike pissing your pants every Sunday night in college with zero regard to Monday morning… you now have to wake up and face the f****ng music. What a terrible tune Monday morning is indeed.
In hopes to shed some light on the obtuse shadow that is the Monday blues, allow us to introduce Sloppy Sauce. What the hell is Sloppy Sauce? The newest STD on the block!? Nicolas Cage’s new movie!? Sadly no.
Sloppy Sauce is that Monday morning jail break while you take your extended morning poop to avoid reality. Each and every Monday, we will be posting a plethora of pictures, videos and a few highlighted tales of the weekend that just may get you through that shit hole we call Monday.
Feel free to send in your boss, co-workers, maybe your office kiss ass.
Sloppy Sauce shirts coming soon.
Happy f*****g Monday, Jockeys.
Had a bad weekend? Let us know about it. Send in your own stories to Officejockeys@gmail.com. Put Sloppy Sauce as the subject line and specify if you wish to be published or stay anonymous. Best of luck with that hangover, champ.