Sexless In Seattle

Our First Date: A Numbers Game

12 – Number of times we exchanged messages before getting her number.

11 – Number of minutes I showed up late.

10 – Number of ice breaker questions shared: “What do you like to do for fun?”,            “What’s your favorite band?”, “Do you have any food allergies?”

9 – Number of times the ice breakers lead to an awkward silence

8 – Number of jokes that went unanswered or misunderstood

7 – Number of times I got caught staring at her

6 – Number of times I got caught staring at the other table’s waitress

5 – Number of times I told her I’m lactose intolerant

4 – Number of times she assured me there is no cream in crème brulee

3 – Number of hours I’ve spent on the toilet because there’s “no cream in crème brulee”

2 – Number of drinks we each ordered

1 – Number of dates we had

 

 

 

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Silent Riot

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