Cubicle Chatter

Big Man Don’t Cry: Fergie VS Golden State

So let’s start this out by saying I did not know Josh Duhmel and Fergie split up, soooo, true love is not of this earth and we’re all prolly gonna die alone. My heart, Mark Wahlberg’s heart and bumble bee’s heart are in pieces. Anyways, our story begins by Josh appearing on some morning talk show BS (not the black face one) and he’s pissed. Like bailing off a motorcycle sliding between a Deceptacons legs shooting a rocket launcher at him pissed, heated. The reason this Hollywood Star is angry is because he thought It was very disrespectful and childish that NBA player Draymond Green wasn’t acting like the professional he is, when Duhamel’s ex wife’s was singing the national anthem at the 2018 all-star game.
Fergie is Duhamel’s wife and Duhamel even added that Draymond knew he was on camera (which is crazy bc were talking about the same guy that couldn’t send a dick pic without posting it on his story)

To start this off, when it comes to performances you usually get a respectful warming ovation when you don’t suck, so the reason Draymond was snickering and being unprofessional is cause she sucked. If Draymond sucks in a game, people  have a lot more to say to him than just snickering. So do your job and don’t suck and shit like this won’t happen. I mean Fergie’s rendition of the National Anthem was actually Ear HIV and she deserves all the negative energy she’s getting right now. It wasn’t just Green laughing it was a handful of all-stars including warriors players. Secondly it’s the fucking national anthem it’s not “A Star is Born” where you can make and remake it 18 god damn times (Lady Gaga feeds off the souls of douchebag males). You think Sir Francis Scott Key intended to have his beautiful symphony turned into a shitty r&b cover?
Anyways,  Duhamel doubled down by saying the 6 ft 7 power forward wasn’t a real man.
Honestly this guys been listening to too much of Optimus Prime’s Boy Scout bullshit trying to define what man is.
So Duhamel says his shit, Draymond sees It and apologizes to Fergie. Everyone’s happy right? Wrong…. This the NBA where pettiness and unnecessary drama flow like water thru a Roman aqueduct ( imagery bitch). No, what transpired was Stephen Curry, loving father and role model, logs into IG and posts the best dance collab since the 2012-2013 Miami Heat Harlem Shake video. In the video is a number of Warriors players post game in the locker room following their 28 pt win over the Knicks including Stephen Curry, Kevin Durant, Demarcus Cousins, Draymond Green, Jordan Bell, and Damion Jones shooing across the locker room. Keep in mind that Kevin Durant dropped 25 points in the 4th while, and Demarcus Cousins got ejected even tho he was injured but THIS is the only thing on their mind. Shutting up a Hollywood power couple and get buckets, the way champions should think.

-OC

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