Cubicle Chatter

Monday Meltdown: Some bad JuJu

I would like to start off this piece by prefacing that I am going to be as completely biased as I can, therefore, there is a very high chance I will make irrational points, sound butt-hurt, and ramble incoherently. But hey, thats showbiz baby.

The Pittsburgh Steelers are good at football. The Pittsburgh Steelers are also very bad at football. Trick question, both of these statements could not be more true. And that was on full display for the World to see Sunday, as we hung with the Saints (arguably the best team in the league) only to watch the game wilt away from us like a head of lettuce in theĀ  warm sun. Because nobody loses games they should have won like the Pittsburgh Stillers. The only team in the NFL that can lose to the Oakland Raiders, a team that is trying to tank their season, and beat the New England Patriots in a span of 7 days. But I digress, today’s focus is on the Saints and their voodoo witch craft that they pulled last night. Everybody knows that New Orleans is known for 2 things; Mardi Gras and magic. In my expert opinion it should be illegal to play in a city where alcohol and wizardry is celebrated, but thats besides the point. And if you thought this article was gonna resemble the inside of a salt shaker as I do my best to pin this loss on the referees, then BINGO bitch because thats exactly who I’m blaming for this loss. 2 phantom pass interference calls to bail out the Saints on 4th down, you can’t make this shit up. Sure we had plenty of other chances to win the game, including the failed fake punt attempt that gave Drew Brees the ball on the 50 with 4 minutes to play, but again besides the point and what kind of unbiased and rational fan would I be if I didn’t blame everybody but the actual team that lost the game.

So now what you may ask? The answer is simple, we revert back to America’s favorite past time: getting violently drunk and rooting for the dangerous man himself, Baker Mayfield. That’s right, this NFL season was such a shit show that it has all of Yinzer nation rooting for the arch nemesis Cleveland Browns and their beloved band of yellow belly losers. So if you see a Steelers fan next week, do me a favor and buy them a shot, I promise they need it.

Jonner cones

Categories: Cubicle Chatter

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