Sexless In Seattle

The Bachelorette Drinking Game for guys forced to watch it

This past week I allowed myself to become another one of the sackless males that subjected themselves to this reality show. Unlike the majority of you Males who are being forced to watch this, I’m strictly doing this for work. Slave to the content game. Yes, I know there may already be dozens of drinking games out there for this brainless show.

“Take a sip of your wine when guy takes his shirt off!” 

” Take two sips when Hannah says Roll Tide.” 

All sorts of games out there for all you gals but, none are designed for men who are forced to watch this pile of hot trash. Time to throw a wrench in the wheel and change that. Allow me to introduce the Office Jockeys drinking game for men who are forced to watch the bachelorette.

Spoiler alert: The game may subject you to intense drinking as that is only thing that will get you through this hour of misery.

Pick Your poison

Beer, Wine, Liquor, Malt Liquor, Mead

Take a 3 second chug of your beer when

  • When John Paul Jones says something stupid or obvious. Screen Shot 2019-05-16 at 8.09.49 PM.png
  • Anytime a male appears on screen that is more attractive than you. Grab yourself an 18 pack. 
  • When that Tuscaloosa hick hannah says ‘Roll Tide” or references anything regarding Alabama
  • When a contestant takes off his shirt and he’s in better shape than you. Grab yourself another 12 pack
  • The word Hannah is muttered.
  • They Show Hannah’s  friend in the RV monitoring. 
  • The Guys start talking about their feelings
  • The Guys mention “Long term plans”
  • This Idiot spits some ryhmes- 

 

Take a shot when 

  • The ” Box King” Opens his mouth and refers boxes. Yeah, that guy. Screen Shot 2019-05-16 at 8.58.57 PM.png
  • Take a celebratory shot if the Box King does not get a rose. Matter of fact, call of work the next day if that happens, you earned it. 
  • A contestant says he’s falling in love after knowing this girl for 3 days all the menawhile he is competing for her attention with 28 other men. America is imploding.
  • A contestant starts crying. 

 

Chug your liqour, wine or beer if 

  • Your girlfriend who is forcing you to watch this ask ” Why don’t you treat me as good as they treat hannah?”
  • A fight breaks out amongst the bro’s
  • Once the epesoide concludes. You earned yourself a buzz.
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Written by Clarky

 

 

Categories: Sexless In Seattle

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