The (dim) light at the end of the tunnel.
If you thought this was gonna be a doom & gloom, world is going to end piece….you’d be correct. Right now, the Steelers suck ass, there is no other way to put it. I mean you could put my dad and all his drunk friends out there after 4 cases of Rolling Rock and a fifth of Jim Beam, and I think we’d have a better shot at winning. It sure as shit would at least be more entertaining, and maybe we’d even get to see a touchdown dance for the first time this year. It most likely would be NSFW, but that is neither here nor there. They are so bad, that they make me want to drink my own piss while watching them.
But they did something they’ve always done and drew me back in. This season, the one where we shed all the drama, has already been a whirlwind of news stories and weird things happening, the Seahawks game already feels like last season.
Let’s give a quick run down of everything that has happened so far this season.
- 2 days before we are set to play the Patriots, Antonio Brown (public enemy #1) goes to King’s Landing (New England) & joins forces with Cersei (Tom Brady). This, of course is treason against the city of Pittsburgh, which is a crime punishable by death.
- The Steeler’s proceed to shit the bed, ultimately losing the game by 30. Morale is low, but it is still there.
- A week later, we face off against notorious pretty boy, Russell Wilson. Steeler’s proceed to lose this game as well, turns out that’s not the biggest story of the day.
- During the battle, Ben Roethlisberger injures his elbow and we eventually learn he will miss the remainder of the year.
- Insert Mason Rudolph, the bright eyed gun-slinger from Oklahoma State. Long may he reign!
- Morale is now at rock bottom; no quarterback and we start the season 0-2
- Then acting completely out of pocket, the Steeler’s do something they never do, and make a big trade. We get Minka Fitzpatrick for a 1st round pick.
Suddenly, there is hope. Suddenly, there seems to be a glimmer in the future. All of our defensive woes will be solved with this one missing piece. Us Stee’s fans start to think Mason didn’t play all that bad, maybe we can run the table to get to 10-6. Bottom line is, whether the trade works out or not, it puts asses in the seats. And that’s just showbiz baby. It shows the team, and more importantly the fans, that the season isn’t lost and we are still going all in, Ben or no Ben. I gotta hand it to Colbert, Tomlin, & co., it’s a genius move. It makes dumb fans (like myself) forget about how bad that ass hat is who is running the defense and actually gets me excited for the coming weeks. Of course, this will be short lasting once we play our next game, but for the next 4 days, I really don’t want to light all of my Steeler’s attire on fire. So here’s to enjoying these next 4 days and keeping my blood pressure low in the meantime.
At the end of the day, win or lose this season, we don’t have Antonio Brown on our roster, so we are the real winners.