All righty y’all, it’s everyone’s favorite episode…Hometowns Throwdowns! Per Reddit chatter and Reality Steve, tonight’s episode is going to be a real dumpster fire. I guess that means someone’s siblings get too drunk at dinner, a father doesn’t give Peter his blessing, someone’s mom is more attractive than the contestant, and a possible ex boyfriend shows up.
1) ABC really missed the opportunity to play Mulan “I’ll Make A Man Out Of You” during this ax throwing date.
2) Hannah Ann with an ax is honestly one of the most terrifying scenes I’ve seen so far this season.
3) “Peter wrote me a list so that means he loves me” Lots of people write lists, Hannah Ann….
4) Wow, everyone in this family ugly cries.
5) Ranger Rick aka Hannah Ann’s dad is NOT impressed with Peter.
6) Is Jed going to send a tape in for Bachelor: Listen To Your Heart?
7) Why does Hannah Ann’s sister look like she belongs on season one of Laguna Beach?
8) “Don’t use the L word with Hannah Ann unless you absolutely mean it” – Ranger Rick. “Ok, boomer” – Peter
9) I never want to hear Peter describe a relationship again.
10) “Peter, thank you for coming to Iowa” – Kelsey’s mom. “I’m only here for the free wine and crab rangoons” – Probably Peter
11) I never thought you’d be at this point” – Kelsey’s mom as she rewinds the show to Kelsey exploding champagne on her face
12) From far away, it looks like Peter could quite possibly be wearing chunky Fila’s.
13) “Last week, I told her that I was falling in love with her, and she didn’t say anything back. But now looking at her, I just can tell she feels the same.” – Peter, and every other crazy girl.
14) This date is really just a modern version of High School musical.
15) There’s no way Madison’s dad is actually her dad. At best, he could be her older brother. Or the president of your local Sigma Chi.
16) Madison’s dad and Hannah Ann’s dad about to conspire to ruin Peter’s life if he breaks up with the both of them.
17) “I just know she’s the same page on me” – Peter letting his crazy girl out again.
18) OMG VICTORIA F’S DATE FINALLY! Been waiting for this for the past 4 months.
19) Plot twist: Victoria also dated Hunter Hayes
20) Who is Marissa and why is her face blurred out?
21) I feel bad for Victoria’s dog – he has no idea what a homewrecker his mom is.
22) I would die if Victoria F’s parents walked out the front door to this conversation.
23) “It’s so much drama all the time” Victoria F not realizing that she is the cause of the drama and not Peter’s moods.
24) “It’s like I can’t catch a break” well maybe just maybe you shouldn’t be hooking up with your friend’s boyfriends and husbands?
25) I have a feeling this wont be the last we see of Victoria F.
26) Take a shot every time someone says “I’m falling in love with you”.
27) Victoria F would probably like Peter way more if he was married.
28) Did Victoria F ever even deny or explain why she did what she did?
29) Hot Take: Peter keeps Victoria F just so he can take her to Fantasy Suites.
30) Victoria F shouldn’t even be allowed to come to the rose ceremony if Peter didn’t even meet her family
31) Ok, Madison looking like a total queen in this sequin jumpsuit.
32) PETER YOU DUMMY.
33) PETER YOU ARE CANCELLED.
34) I actually feel bad for Kelsey right now. Oh, how the turns tables.
35) I can’t believe I have to watch another episode where Victoria F gaslights Peter.